Cornell Students to Receive Free Breakfast Before Early Morning Drinking and Partying on Annual Slope Day

Every year Cornell students cap off the spring semester with Slope Day, a large concert held after the final day of classes that takes place on Cornell’s Libe Slope.

Though the chosen musical acts never seem to impress a majority of the student body, a significant percentage of students still partake in the main activities of the day: waking up early, drinking, hopping from party to party, arriving at the slope, and leaving shortly thereafter to additional parties (or to nap).

While you cannot expect the result of thousands of stressed out college students letting loose at the same time to resemble anything like order or propriety, the extent of Slope Day’s mayhem is rather astounding. Carts ferry passed-out students across the slope, which by the end of the concert has becomes a sea of garbage. The campus’s health center Gannett resembles a field hospital with scores of students hooked up to IVs piled onto mattresses.

Last year a student was even airlifted to a trauma center.

This year’s Slope Day, however, will be slightly different. Free breakfast sandwiches and fruit will be available to all reveling students from 9am-11am to ensure they have something in their stomachs before consuming massive amounts of alcohol. And don’t worry because vegan and gluten-free options will be available.

In an op-ed in the Cornell Daily Sun, undergraduate student-elected trustee Yamini Bhandari ’17, Student Assembly representative Matthew Indimine ’18, and Cornell EMS president Prawallika Gangidi ’17 advertised the free breakfast to Cornell students, many of whom apparently skip the first meal of the day on Slope Day and go straight to imbibing. The op-ed also focuses on the competitive culture at Cornell and its unhealthy consequences, and correctly notes that being able to balance work and play is required in the “real world” outside of college.

Interestingly enough, the original article was titled “Treat Yo’ Self” whereas the article is now titled “Self-Care and Slope Day.” It’s difficult to come up with a reason as to (1) why the title changed and (2) why it was originally titled that in the first place.

Title changes aside, the real point here is the embarrassing infantilization of Cornell students. In this case we see adults being instructed and reminded to eat our oats and responsibly balance our lives, as if these aren’t things all should be aware of before entering college. Sure, no one wants to see people suffering from over-consumption of alcohol, but at the same time students should be held to a higher standard of responsibility, and as the new article title points out, “self-care.” If a student does decide to skip breakfast, consume a lot of alcohol, and suffers the unfortunate consequences, perhaps that student should not just receive a slap on the wrist but some sterner punishment to actually deter the behavior.

Only recently have Americans living outside college bubbles learned about the inanity of the modern college campus—safe spaces, trigger warnings, favorable views towards censorship, etc.—and here we see how these more militant and unruly manifestations of the social justice mantra are initially born. It starts with a sense of superiority inculcated, at least at Cornell, by the constant refrain that we students are the “best and brightest.” After this comes the sense of entitlement to more services, care, oversight, etc.—for the “best and brightest” truly deserve it, do they not? This is where free breakfast on Slope Day comes from. And, after having some if not all of their demands met, bored entitled students turn to greater demands, ones which necessitate not just a few breakfast sandwiches but, for example, the curtailment of civil liberties with which they disagree with.

But, why cry over vomited alcohol? What’s done is done. Free breakfast for all!